5.31.11
I really hope that someone comes to visit me today. I am sure E will be here, but I don't know if M, or K or T will come. I hope someone does. At least with E bringing my phone, I'll be able to check texts and facebook and other things. I think I never should have checked in to begin with. I'm occupying a bed that would be better filled by someone who needs it. Just waiting for that knock on my door to tell me it's time to go home
I think if I stay here, it really will drive me insane. I feel like a caged animal here.
Another person, a girl we'll call Jenna. A total wacko. She comes up to me and says "are you new on the unit? You need a hug." and hugs me. I generally don't turn down a hug, but this seems bizarre. Add to the fact that she smells weird, and I don't touch smelly things. And then there's the mustard stain on her grey shirt that is falling off her shoulders, exposing a dingy bra strap. She walks around, smacking her gum, barefoot like a tiger waiting for the chance to devour a pile of raw meat or an antelope carcass. She tells me I am "cute as a button" and calls me "peanut".
It's 2:20 pm right now, and the nurse, Sharon, is talking to my social worker and doctor to see if I can be released into the care of E. I'd love to go home, get a real shower, and sleep in my own bed. As it is, sitting on this rock hard bed, I keep going back to the thought that if I stay here any longer, I am going to actually go batshit insane.
At this point of June 2, I have a Chiropracter appointment shortly, I will add more later today of the chronicle of my stay on the unit. I can't believe how much I wrote in the short time I was there.
Childhood friend, D, has invited me to go to another part of the state this weekend to be with her as she buries her grandmother's ashes. I will likely go, as I really have nothing else going on, and at least I won't be alone.
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